From your very first meeting through the birth, adoptive parents and birth parents can have quite a bit of interaction. This extends even further in a fully open adoption. Semi-Open vs. Open Adoption The type of communication you will have… Read More
I am Dean Kirschner. Why "Libby's Corner?" This blog, actually, all of Adoption Makes Family, is a tribute to my mother who brought adoption to our family in 1956 when my older sister was adopted.
When my mother died in 1967, she left a legacy of love for children that transcended any biological connection. Having been only 8 years old at the time of her death, I do not recall hearing specific words about adoption from my mother. However, through the years, having many conversations with her friends and our family, I have learned so much about my mother's feelings toward children, toward adoption.
Personally, the experience of adoption has been in my life since my own birth. I'm the little brother of an older sister who was adopted at birth. Adoption was never a big deal in our family. We were all treated the same. Biologically conceived by our parents or adopted, there was never a sense for me that we were loved any differently.
I remember at my first home study meeting in preparation to adopt my first son. The social worker asked if I had any personal experience with adoption. My first reaction was a sense of connection. I lived with adoption all my life. I embrace adoption. Now, I am the father of two boys, both adopted.
Every day I realize how much I love my sons. I laugh with my sons. I play with my sons. I parent my sons. Some days there are frustrations. More days, there are fun and joyful times with my sons. Some days, I have had to be a disciplinarian. More days, I am the supporter, the advocate, the fixer, the helper, the confidant, the teacher, the guide, the safety net, the protector. To sum it up, I'm Dad.
My sons are adopted, yet we don't hold that term as a distinction of difference. We celebrate adoption as a means by which I became Dad and they became my children. When I introduce my sons, I introduce them as my sons. Introduce my sister as my sister. The stories of how we became a family are amazingly wonderful. We share our adoption stories proudly. The adoption stories speak to the excitement of becoming a sister, a brother, a son, a grandson, a cousin, a nephew.
I have spoken with my sister and my sons about their feelings about their birth parents and the adoption. No one has forgotten that they were adopted, because adoption is an open conversation in our family. However, there is no angst about adoption. We answer questions honestly and allow complete and open discussions about birth parents and their adoption story. There are no mysteries or secrets. There are stories of love, excitement and family.
As for how we get along as siblings, my sister and I have our disagreements. More often, we have our agreements. We have fought, loved, laughed, played. We are just normal siblings. I don't feel adoption plays into our relationship. We have had wonderful discussions about adoption and birth parents. However, when it comes down to just being brother and sister, we are just that. Brother and sister. My sister has actively reached out and chatted with birth mothers who have created an adoption plan with Adoption Makes Family.
My sons have the same type of relationship. They love like brothers. They fight like brothers. They protect each other and look out for each other. They are not biologically related. They are related through adoption. But, above all, they are brothers.
And so, I turn back to my mother, Libby. I learned from my mother the unconditional love for children. Starting in her own little corner of our family, she shaped me, my sister, my sons and our world. Hopefully, this blog, Libby's Corner, can do the same for you.
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Adoption Tax Credit
Adoptive parents around the country may qualify for a tax credit. Parents who either adopted a child or tried to adopt a child may claim the adoption credit . Here are nine things you should know about this credit. Credit…. Read More
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Adoption Expenses Covered for Birth Mothers in Maryland
An unplanned pregnancy can be scary. There are undoubtedly a million questions running through your mind. How did this happen? What’s next? Can I afford to keep this child? Is adoption an option? But before you make any decision, it… Read More
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Birth Mother: The Benefits of Selecting a Local Adoption Family
One of the toughest decisions a birth mother makes is creating an adoption plan. This is quickly followed by another tough decision – who do I trust to raise my child? The process for selecting an adoption family is unique… Read More
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The Meaning & Importance of Sending Pictures to Birth Mothers
In an open adoption, birth parents typically have some degree of contact with adoptive families. But “open” can mean different things to different people, and the degree of openness depends on the birth and adoptive parents’ previously agreed upon arrangement…. Read More
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Dealing with an Unplanned Pregnancy
If you are dealing with an unplanned pregnancy, you are undoubtedly experiencing a range of emotions. But it is important to know you are not alone. Every year in the United States, about half of all pregnancies are unplanned. And… Read More
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November is National Adoption Awareness Month
Every child deserves a loving home. In 1984 President Gerald R. Ford created the Adoption Week, a national event designed to shine a light on a great cause. But it didn’t take long to realize that a week just wasn’t… Read More
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The GOP Tax Bill, the Elimination of the Adoption Tax Credit, and the Implications
Last week, House Republicans unveiled the “Tax Cuts and Jobs Act,” a 429-page overhaul to the country’s current tax code. One of the casualties in the current bill is the one-time Federal Adoption Tax Credit – $13,570 per child –… Read More
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Adoption Tax Credit
CNN recently did a news piece on the elimination of the adoption tax credit. For anyone interested in adoption, this is so important. Check it out! http://www.cnn.com/2017/11/07/health/adoption-tax-credit-families/index.html
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Facing an Unplanned Pregnancy
An unplanned pregnancy can be a tough time filled with confusion and uncertainty. It’s easy to feel overwhelmed by the changes that you are experiencing. Adoption Makes Family can help you navigate this overwhelming time in a sensitive and caring… Read More